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I wouldn’t call myself a diehard Power Rangers fan, I tuned in to the original show in the 90’s when I was a youngin, but I was never a crazed fan of the series. Obviously I loved the movie with Ivan Ooze, collected the cool toys, and got mad when my mom taped over a VHS I had saved of that episode when the Rangers do battle against a big pig monster that turns them into food and eats them and replaced it with that Otis and Milo movie with the talking animals. To this day, top ten angriest moments of my life. So yeah, I enjoyed the original series but nothing extreme. It was only a matter of time until a gritty modern-day movie would be made to cash in on the nostalgia of us 90’s kids, and that time has finally come with the new Power Rangers movie. So was it the unimaginable pig slop that I thought it would be? I’m surprised to say that no, this movie was not terrible. Continue reading Power Rangers Review
This movie made me come to a very disheartening realization after seeing it. As I sat in the empty theater and the credits rolled, and let me stop right there because reading that back it sort of makes it sound like I was sitting in the theater after everyone had left, contemplating what I had just watched. Only half of that is true, I did sit for a second and reflect on what I had seen, but the theater was empty from the beginning. Now that that’s more clear, let’s continue. Anywho, what this movie made me realize is that there is such a thing as too much brutal violence for me. I never thought I would say that, and I sort of feel like a pussy for typing it, but it’s true. The Belko Experiment was too unrelentingly violent for ol’ Shawny boy. BE WARNED: I am going to go full spoiler here. I normally don’t do that, but I feel like I need to so I can properly explain what I hated about this, and to defend my objection of this piece of trash being too violent. So if you don’t want to know what happens, turn back. Continue reading The Belko Experiment Review
Let me throw this out there right away: I was never a huge fan of Beauty and the Beast when I was a kid. I just didn’t watch it that often. I was a Lion King, Aladdin, Hercules, Fox and the Hound kinda boy. In my young, pre-pubescent mind, Beauty and the Beast was a girl’s movie, much like The Little Mermaid or Snow White. Can a child be sexist? I don’t know, but that’s just what I thought growing up. So I wasn’t super duper excited to see the live action retelling of Beauty and the Beast like I was to see The Jungle Book. To get prepared, I rewatched the old cartoon for the first time in at least 20 years. It’s good, I understand why people like it, but it just isn’t one of my favorites. Continue reading Beauty and the Beast Review
I don’t know about you, but ever since the first X-Men movie I have always felt like something was missing from Wolverine. Every time he sunk his claws into a bad guy, I yearned for blood. It only made sense right? I mean, Wolverine has uber-sharp metallic claws that he uses to rip people to shreds, yet there was never any blood. It always kinda took me out of the movie. Not to mention that a guy like Wolverine, a notorious rebel who can’t be killed and doesn’t give a fuck about anything, would constantly be swearing both in and out of combat. I understand that not every X-Men movie could have been rated R, but still, I always felt like the character of Wolverine had so much more to offer than what had been given to us. Continue reading Logan Review
The night is dark and full of… nocturnal animals? A violent, brutal, tension-filled ball of fury, Nocturnal Animals is a sight to behold. Telling a story within a story, think The Princess Bride but a lot more fucked up, the movie is about a woman named Susan (Amy Adams) who receives a manuscript of a novel dedicated to her from her estranged ex-husband Edward (Jake Gyllenhaal). Susan hasn’t spoken to Edward in 20 years after leaving him for the much more handsome Hutton. Once Susan begins reading the novel, she becomes transfixed with it and begins thinking back to her past relationship.
A sequel to one of my favorite surprises of 2014, John Wick: Chapter 2 picks up the intense, ball tingling, ass clenchingly awesome action that we all learned to love in the previous film. Keanu Reeves returns as the titular badass John Wick, fresh off his massacre of Russian thugs for the theft of his car and murder of his adorable puppy. Unlike the first movie, where I went in with pretty low expectations and not sure what to expect, I went into John Wick 2 with expectations of a high caliber action thriller that barely lets off the gas with its headshots, body throws, neck snaps, nut punches, and other deliriously delightful depictions of violence I could only imagine in my darkest fantasies. I wasn’t sure it could do it, I was almost certain the movie would be a bit of a letdown, but goddamn not only were my expectations met, they were exceeded. John Wick: Chapter 2 is superior to the first film in just about every way. Continue reading John Wick: Chapter 2 Review