Category Archives: B

The Belko Experiment Review

the-belko-experiment-image-john-c-mcginley.jpgThis movie made me come to a very disheartening realization after seeing it. As I sat in the empty theater and the credits rolled, and let me stop right there because reading that back it sort of makes it sound like I was sitting in the theater after everyone had left, contemplating what I had just watched. Only half of that is true, I did sit for a second and reflect on what I had seen, but the theater was empty from the beginning. Now that that’s more clear, let’s continue. Anywho, what this movie made me realize is that there is such a thing as too much brutal violence for me. I never thought I would say that, and I sort of feel like a pussy for typing it, but it’s true. The Belko Experiment was too unrelentingly violent for ol’ Shawny boy. BE WARNED: I am going to go full spoiler here. I normally don’t do that, but I feel like I need to so I can properly explain what I hated about this, and to defend my objection of this piece of trash being too violent. So if you don’t want to know what happens, turn back. Continue reading The Belko Experiment Review

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Beauty and the Beast Review

Let me throw this out there right away: I was never a huge fan of Beauty and the Beast when I was a kid. I just didn’t watch it that often. I was a Lion King, Aladdin, Hercules, Fox and the Hound kinda boy. In my young, pre-pubescent mind, Beauty and the Beast was a girl’s movie, much like The Little Mermaid or Snow White. Can a child be sexist? I don’t know, but that’s just what I thought growing up. So I wasn’t super duper excited to see the live action retelling of Beauty and the Beast like I was to see The Jungle Book. To get prepared, I rewatched the old cartoon for the first time in at least 20 years. It’s good, I understand why people like it, but it just isn’t one of my favorites. Continue reading Beauty and the Beast Review

Birdman Review

BirdmanApparently, Birdman is not the spiritual sequel to Soundgarden’s “Spoonman” as I had believed. Really has nothing to do with it actually. I totally thought they were somewhat related, but I was wayyyyyyy off. Continue reading Birdman Review

Boyhood Review

maxresdefault-1I’m still trying to come up with the right word to describe Boyhood, because I don’t think simply calling it a “movie” gives it justice. It’s just so much more than that. See, there isn’t really a plot, there is just life. There are no heroes and villains, just people. Watching it really felt like we were following around this young boy as he grew up, witnessing every small detail of his life, from the mundane, everyday aspects of life, to the more personal and intimate moments. It’s one of the more fascinating films I have ever seen. Continue reading Boyhood Review

Blended Review

Don't look everyone, it's another Adam Sandler movie!
Don’t look everyone, it’s another Adam Sandler movie!

What happened to you Adam Sandler? When I was a kid I used to love your movies, but your recent track record of films is making me question if your earlier movies were actually good or if I only liked them because I was a pre-teen. Sandler’s latest flick Blended is not the atrocity that Jack and Jill and Grown Ups 2 were, but it is far from enjoyable. Boring is the word that comes to mind. It just feels like Sandler isn’t into it anymore. He delivers lame jokes in an unenthusiastic and monotonous tone that makes it sound like he is as bored as the audience. Drew Barrymore seems like she’s at least trying, but the material she is given to work with sucks. Mostly the movie tries to rely on the kids to make us laugh, but they mostly come off as annoying or over-the-top. Continue reading Blended Review

Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa Review

Irving Zisman: Bad Grandpa
Irving Zisman: Bad Grandpa

Bad Grandpa is the fourth installment in the Jackass franchise, this time focusing on Johnny Knoxville disguised as 86-year-old Irving Zisman. Unlike the previous Jackass movies Bad Grandpa has, well sort of has, a plot. Zisman must take his young grandson Billy (Jackson Nicoll) to his estranged father after Billy’s mother is sent to jail. Along the way they get into a series of mishaps where the camera catches unsuspecting real people and their reactions to the disgusting and inappropriate Irving. Continue reading Jackass Presents: Bad Grandpa Review

Blackfish Review

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Blackfish is a documentary directed by Gabriela Cowperthwaite that focuses on the captivity of a killer whale named Tilikum. Tilikum was involved in the death of three people, and the documentary explores Tilikum’s capture off the coast of Iceland and his alleged harassment by SeaWorld which the film argues led to Tilikum’s aggression. It’s a disturbing film, one that is sure to leave animal lovers furious. It also opened my eyes to how these animals are treated in captivity and how wrong it is.

Continue reading Blackfish Review